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Army Ants Launch Marine Corps in Response to Climate Change

The Army Ants have released a press statement today announcing the creation of a new Marine Corps in response to the global threat of climate change.

Field Marshall Anddec, supreme commander of the Army Ants, told us, “We are seeing a changing terrain as a result of rising sea levels and increased rains brought about by human-induced climate change, which is limiting our ability to manoeuvre. We must therefore adapt and develop a greater capability to operate on both water and dry land. The Marine Corps will deliver that capability.”

The announcement has already created a huge amount of interest and excitement among Army Ants around the world, with long queues of eager ants outside recruiting mounds.

Ler, a Lance Corporal queuing to join the new Marine Corps, told us, “This is a great new opportunity. Usually we cut up leaves and carry them in long lines, but now we’ll use them as landing craft instead. I can’t wait to get out on the water!”

While some veterans have raised concerns about the new Corps, suggesting the change has come too soon and risks losing the key elements that make the species such a joy to be part of, most have been very supportive, excited by the prospect of a new theatre of operations.

They have also been helped by the nod to tradition given by the use of Latin for the motto of the new marine corps. The current motto for Army Ants on land is sed parva forti (small but mighty), and the new motto for the Marine Corps is Non est satis flumen wide (There is no river wide enough).

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